Retrospectives: Learned Supernova
petals from white rosesfall on open graves as shallow hearts mourn the death of this bright star supernovas fade faster than you think when we underestimate the glow that it leaves in your life radiates beyond time and even when you shut it out it still will light your way and all that you've learned from this bright shining star will stay locked in your heart and you can call it back up when you're ready to grow though you've run so far petals from white roses fall on open graves as shallow hearts mourn the death of this bright star supernovas fade faster than you think when we underestimate
Retrospectives: after the storm
peace fallslike a sheet of darkness over eyes that are too tired to see the damage that's been done. debris litters the pat the storm took, evidence of the destruction of the evil one. cross my heart, I hope to cry at the sight of the dead pieces of me on the side of the road. its amazing to think I got through it alive, because I know I wasn't holding your hand. So I'm filled with shame in knowing this storm in my heart was endured alone. How do I return to you? with my head to my chest on my knees begging forgiveness and singing your praises.
rain
its the first rain of the season. can you smell it? can you hear the pitter patter of the drops on your back porch? can you see the clouds rolling and hear them echo off the ground? does the gray fill your eyes, having the reverse effect of a solar eclipse, where you can't help but stare mercilessly into their gaping forms, surrendering yourself to their power? it makes you long for that memory. the one that you can't push aside as you stand in the street with your arms outstretched, your head tilted towards the heavens. your eyes bat fiercly as the rain washes over your face, and that memory becomes clearer and clearer, as if the rain were cleaning it, washing away the fog of time, so that you're left with nothing but this image of beauty culminated in your mind. the world is beautiful.
this is for you...
the breeze brushes against my faceand brings a tear to my eye for your life i must trace with each of your goodbyes you leave me and then come back and think it'll all be the same you'll break my heart again, that's a fact you'll desecrate my name i must leave you and say farewell move onto something more on this love i can no longer dwell there's nothing here to live for when you said you loved me the sound of your voice gave you away i believed you and shall pay the fee but now i cannot stay i'm leaving you forever today to live a life of my own here's one last thing i have to say i wont give up til the world is shown. autophobics don't eat broccoli. love.
i just realized that i don't like good mourning as much as i like previous albums.
no title yet. its not even done. she's alone. she's sitting at a small, round, two person table, in the middle of the crowded student union. she's resting her head softly on her hand so that her blond pony tail falls forward over her ears. her legs are crossed delicately under the table, and her foot hops nervously back and forth. a few stray hairs fall gracefully in front of her eyes and she brushes them back with a finely manicured hand. her french tips are the perfect compliment to her tan peacoat over a pink sweater. sporatically, her eyes glance up from the screen of her laptop, and focus on the area around the door. she's waiting for someone. perhaps an old friend, reuniting after the crazy post-high school summer in their new grown-up lives. or maybe she's waiting for a boy, the love of her life. her foot still bobs anxiously, but she's switched legs.
published
one of my poems was published. i'm cho excited. : Requiem for a Friend. it is with great sadness that i must watch as the young at heart make too early graves and it is with great sorrow that i must stand shoulder to shoulder with your future wondering in my mind why it had to be you and it is with great contempt for what is out of my control that i must lay this whisper upon the ears of someone who can't answer me with words the only thing i have is solace in the fact that your existence has only made me stronger and i am a better person because of you.
guitars
YAY guitars are back!!! WOOT WOOT. i'm soo excited. I'm gonna be JAMMIN to the wee hours of the morning tonight!!! BUT, I can't play until I finish my homework. Or at least get enough done to bs my way through class tomorrow. haha. I have soo much reading to do. I've realized that college is just a bunch of words. READ READ. I have to read a play a week for english/theater. I think i'm gonna start calling it THEAGLISH. what do you think? cuz its basically one thing. jen, anthony and matt came over today. that was weird. i haven't seen those folks in decades. they are apparently without bassist. hrmm. i think it would be fun to be in a band again. get writing songs again. I miss it. I really do. There have been sooo many in the past. there was autophobic, then only so lucky, then the spoon thieves. those were all good times. hehe. and of course the Q's!!! but, sadly, i've had more rehearsals with the other bands than with the q's. I think. owell. the q's are tight, they just aren't fulfilling my musical joneses. what with everyone being on such different schedules, and half the members are out of town...or will be soon. thats okay. we are still tight. haha. well, i need to get onto my homework. maybe i'll hit up my homie chad, say hey, tell him about my musical stuff. heh. peace -peace-carly-