distractions and foundations

so i've been officially back in seattle since thursday night. i have been house/dog-sitting all weekend, so i hesitate to say that life has been back to normal. being in someone else's house has actually enabled me to successfully keep myself separated from normal. an observation that i made in coming back from haiti this time around is that this "real life" that we all live in is really just full of distractions. there are enough insignificant things going on around us that if you chose to, you would never have to deal with anything of substance (that wouldn't be a healthy existence, but that's not my point). i have spent the weekend indulging in distractions in order to avoid my life. starting on sunday, though, i've slowly started to take steps to start dealing with things. i've done a lot of processing, had a few difficult (but good) conversations, started researching, etc. i have realized that at this point, i'm unsure about everything in my life right now. there is not one thing that i'm certain of, other than jesus. initially, this was terrifying. but then i started to think about the lessons that i learned in haiti, and the things i want to translate to my life here, and the things i want to let go of and the things i want to grow in. and i'm actually quite happy to be in this position. i have been brought to a place where i have no other choice but to trust god. a lot of the things are naturally going to fall away as god builds me up to fulfill his glory and plan for my life. today is the first day since being home that i've felt good, and encouraged, and happy.